Mad Skills

Confession: I like spy movies. I've always wanted to have the skills of these fictional super secret agents. Being one doesn't actually appeal to me, but their resourcefulness and ability to get in or out of any situation is remarkable. Stuck in a jam? Well, it's a good thing I brought along a toothpick and a rubber band. Be out in a jiffy. Whatever is in their mental repertoire, their surroundings, their pocket, or a phone call away - it's more than enough for whatever circumstance in which they are. Never ill-equipped, they can develop a plan and walk it out. One that is effective, successful.


In the real world, outside of the world of Bourne, we often feel quite different. Incompetent, inept, inane. The good news is that we don't have to be Jason Bourne to get a job done. Jesus ascended and sent the Comforter to us. Not to comfort us the way chicken noodle soup can, but to empower us with gifts of wisdom, peace, joy, and even knowledge. Now that's comforting. No one has more analytical skills, is more efficient, has a higher IQ, or is more resourceful than our Father in heaven. When we give ourselves to Him (our past, present, and future), whatever and all we are, He takes it. He molds it. He leads us to places where all these things can bring Him maximum glory. For instance, I grew up with an absent father who struggled to live life victoriously. As a result, it took many years for me to understand the love of the Father, to see Him as Father God. Initially, I felt I was at a disadvantage, but I wasn't. I got to learn (and am still learning) about the Father's love directly from the Father of all. That's pretty cool. On Saturday, June 19th, I got a phone call requesting that I preach and share of the word of God the following day. Of course, I agreed. The Lord had been calling me aside all week just to teach me specifically about the love of the Father, it depths, it's consistency, it's abundance and surety. Immediately the Holy Spirit confirmed that I should share these things the following day. Not until late that night after I had finished my sermon did I see online that the next day was in fact Father's Day. Not having celebrated it much, I am not generally mindful of the date. So, there I was the next day a woman who grew up without the presence of a father preaching to the fatherless (our church is full of orphaned and abandoned children) about the love of our Father God. It was beautiful and you could see hearts and minds reaching out for, excepting and understanding His love more. It is one small example of how our God is a master planner. When we put ourselves into His hands, nothing is lost. We don't have to be spies to be effective. We just have to be open and accepting of His molding, making, and leading. As clay, we are safest in the Potter's hands. Let Him be your Potter - He's pretty good at it.

Say What?

I'm back! I wish you could hear the inflection in my voice. It gives power and emphasis to the phrase. Can you hear it? I'm baaaa-aaack! Use your imagination.

The United States is a fantastic country. I just spent two months and three weeks there. That is a record amount of time that I have been home in over three years. What a trip it was! For all my friends and family reading, it was fantastic to see you and fellowship with you. What a joy! God moved in wondrous ways, demonstrating to me so thoughtfully that He is my Full Provision. For every type of need, want, desire - He is. Awesome!

While in the States , I found myself struggling against the place He had put me. It's an interesting thing to have no earthly possessions that tie you to a particular place. When overseas I am content with feeling a bit disconnected at times, but when you are at "home" that isn't the desired reaction. I found myself longing to return to India quickly, but for the wrong reasons. I wanted to run back to the mission field because that is where I had placed my identity. So the Lord posed this question to me while I was going through the visa process, "What if I say no?" I immediately rebelled against the thought. Surely, that isn't the Lord speaking. I felt confusion, doubt, hurt, and even anger - all the things that don't necessarily glorify Him. He followed with, "Will you still love me?"

People tend to put certain Christians on some sort of spiritual pedestal, but the truth of the matter is that I have the same number of chromosomes as all of you. I don't have super powers, and haven't been bit by any radio active spiders. The Lord is constantly drawing me back to what my life is all about, where my identity is found- a deep, trusting love relationship with Him. That should be the only reason we do anything, because we are His and He is ours.

And so now with a gentle reminder from the Lord and fully expecting wondrous things, I am very happy to say to my friends in India, "I"m baaaaaaaaaaaaa-aaaaaaaaaaaackk!!!!"

Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don't try to figure out everthing on your own. Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go. He's the one who will keep you on track.

Proverbs 3:5-6

The Message

Question?

My hiatus from blogging is coming to an end. It's time to give my fingers a work out and get some thoughts communicated. The problem with going on a blogger's vacation is that when you find the gumption to write, there is an absolute overload of ideas to expound upon. Where to begin? I'll start with punctuation marks. Of all the typographical symbols out there, the question mark causes me the most trepidation. I oft times find myself peering at it with anxiety. What if I don't know the answer to the words preceding it? I like to have the answers. What does it imply if I don't have the correct response? "How old are you?" and "How much weight have you gained?" will most certainly be met with disdain by the average American woman. There was once a time when I would become irate when greeted with highly personal questions. I felt that if there was something I wanted an individual to know about my innermost self, then I would have mentioned it. The walls of self preservation were so high that they deflected all enquiring minds. But where would we be without those who query? Isolated and possibly ignorant. In some cultures (and among many controlling personalities) there has to be a certain art to how you make inquiries. Asking "why" and "how" can be viewed as disrespectful and signify your lack of faith in a person's competence. Often questions can be seen as intrusive and even rude. Proverbs 27:17 says, "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." Questions have that potential. To sharpen and challenge. They can help shave away the old rusting parts of our thinking, to draw us closer to one another, and to even draw us closer to Him. Jesus asked Simon Peter if he loved Him. Jesus knew the answer, but yet He asked. Why? So Peter would mull over the answer. Questions can focus our attention upon what is meaningful. Asking them has also been a struggle for me in times past, particularly asking out of need. Pride makes it painful. We fail even to make our requests known to God. A friend of mine asked me today, "What material things are you praying for?" I didn't have any to list. The next question was, "So, you don't need anything?" Well of course I do. Then the question with an obvious answer is, "Why aren't you asking God for them?" Matthew 7:7 says "Ask, and it shall be given unto you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you." Maturity in my walk with with the Lord and friends in the Body of Christ who sharpen me have caused me to appreciate the fearsome question mark. It doesn't tear us down or make us vulnerable. Through its use we can be edified, centered, and sharpened. It is not to be ran from, but embraced. Question mark, I fear you no longer.

Come

There are some phrases that we hear over and over again. "Please." "Thank you." "How are you doing?" Recently, in the past few months there is a new phrase that I do not go a day without hearing. "Come Didi." I hear this statement first thing in the morning, during every break between classes, during playtime and study time, before dinner, after dinner, and the small time in between. These beautiful children are always longing for my presence. I will admit that I'm not the only one. They are also very big fans of Season Didi and Donnabelle Didi, but being the resident "Didi" I hear it a little more often. It feels like their need for attention and love is never satisfied.
God loves me so much that He made sure He sent me to a village that has a coffee shop. I frequent there whenever I get a chance. EVERY time I am there I am greeted by the same young lady who is in her early twenties. She loves to talk with me even though she speaks very little English. When I am sitting reading a book, she will just come near sitting, smiling, saying a few words - always appearing delicate and fragile. Even when I am with someone, she makes sure to become a part of the conversation with a smile and nod. Going to the coffee shop to be alone is out of the question. She is there. She told me recently that I am her very best friend. I am very independent person. I have never been a huge fan of the clingy type. She recently told me, "I have life problem. I have one friend. So lonely. Can you help me? Tell me. What is my life problem?" What a shame it would have been if I had been too busy for her, to give her answers.
Incontestably, I am not the Son of God, but during His three years of ministry He too could rarely be found alone. People were always flocking to Him in hoards. People who needed answers, acknowledgment, and affirmation. Why? He was the living presence of God on this earth. In His company these things were found. When Jesus left He told them that it was best that He left because the Comforter, the Holy Spirit would come. We need not be distraught when people cling to us. We need not turn them away because they may inconvenience us. They are trying to cling to His presence living in you. The world is hungry for Him. My job as His ambassador is to constantly be holding a traffic sign pointing up to Him when people come looking for something only He can provide. We should not be discouraged or even annoyed by the need of those surrounding us. Do we grow tired and weary? Undoubtedly - that is why He promises that His strength is sufficient.

Eventful

To say that the last few weeks has been eventful, is the understatement of the century. There is an old saying, "When it rains, it pours." How true it is. How true it is. I will not begin to regurgitate the trials and tribulations that have been encountered over the last few weeks. Instead, I will tell you of His wonderful, glorious grace and power. For, my dear readers, when the trials rain down so does His provision and mercy. There is not a single battle or a solitary war that He is ill equipped to win. I have seen the Lord heal the wounded. One of our parents was given a 40% survival rate while undergoing an emergency operation to deliver her baby 6 weeks early. She was suffering from a pancreatic condition that was life threatening and could only be treated if she delivered her child. Her little girl was born weighing 4.4 lbs while being six weeks premature! God was preparing this child for early delivery in the womb! Both are home and smiling today (just two weeks later). Some may account this to the wonders of medical science. I attribute it to a God who can work even through a donkey, our God who is intimate with the inner workings of man, He who has the power to heal any ailment. I have seen the Lord restore what was lost. Something very dear to me escaped my grasp this week, but the Lord returned it in perfect condition. The Lord gives strength and wisdom when we have none. I beheld this first hand. While our parents were away, I was blessed with the daunting task of caring for eleven children. For almost eight years, this has been done daily in a classroom - but, to be a parent, a teacher, a nurse, and a playmate..... I commend every parent on the face of the planet who cares, protects, and loves their children as parents should. Your assignment is rigorous, but full of the sweet pleasures that only a caretaker can know. I have seen Him use His people to fight for those who cannot fight for themselves. Through His church I have witnessed His hands going forth to war for and provide a beautiful life for those who cannot care for themselves. That God chooses to move through us is indeed prodigious, staggering. The list goes on and on, but I want to take a moment to thank each individual who has been praying for me and for the work that God is doing in India. Intercessory prayer works. I know that my life has been spared, that my heart and body has been able to endure, that my mind can find peace, and that mountains have been moved because of your prayers. THANK YOU! Remember fellow warriors, everything you need - He is.

And the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord shall raise him up; and if he have committed sins, they shall be forgiven him. Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. Elias was a man subject to like passions as we are, and he prayed earnestly that it might not rain: and it rained not on the earth by the space of three years and six months.

James 5: 15-17

A Force for Him

I feel like these beautiful kids have a lot more to teach me than I have to teach them. They remind me what it is to laugh - what it means to take pleasure in the smallest of gifts, gestures, and actions. They warm my heart and bring me such joy. I wish I could claim each and every one of them as my own - raise them as my own. That's what Christ has done for them and myself ofcourse - asserted us as His own. I think the Lord has sent me here to remind them of this very thing, and to train them up in His love, His scripture, His Truth. Recently, I started a youth group for the children who are 13 or older. We have seven teenagers at this age who are trying to understand what it means to be a man or woman of the one true God. We talk about what it means to be a force for Him. I feel such a sense of urgency where these young people are concerned. Soon they will venture into the world alone - a world full of idols, oppression, and doubt. I want His truth and love to fill them completely so they can go forth in His love and power. Would you be willing to say a special prayer for these youth this week? Poonam, Vijay, Arpit, Sachin, Goodu, Vicky, and Sushila. They aren't my children, but they are His. Let's pray they remain in His hands, in His Way.

Gaining More of Him

All of my life I have been a bit of an oddball in one way or another. I have walked to the beat of my own drum. As you can imagine, I never really flourished amongst controlling personality types. My very essence rebels against stereotypes, cultural guidelines, and legalistic criterion. I would have never survived in the 19th century when the simple act of laughing too loudly was unsuitable for females. This is who I am. Walking with Him has taught me some very valuable lessons. Who I am, should be flexible - not inflexible, but viscous. We put our likes and dislikes on a pedestal making them law in our own hearts, thinking these statutes define who we are. So what is the problem with this individualism? Two things immediately come to mind. #1 One would be destined to despondency, unhappiness. All the world isn't conformed to our specific preferences. He should be our delight, not circumstances. If we only do what feels comfortable and pleasing, then we are simply Epicureans who worship at the altar of pleasure. #2 Effectiveness will be limited greatly. The only guidelines by which we should be governed are those given to us in His Word. We should be making it a point not to always "be ourselves," but to be all things to all people. Why? Paul says it best in 1 Corinthians 9:19-23. "For though I am free from all men, I have made myself a servant to all, that I might win the more; and to the Jews I became as a Jew, that I might win Jews; to those who are under the law, as under the law, that I might win those who are under the law; to those who are without law, as without law (not being without law toward God, but under law toward Christ), that I might win those who are without law; to the weak I became as weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all men, that I might by all means save some. Now this I do for the gospel’s sake, that I may be partaker of it with you." So here in India, I find myself doing things that are nowhere in my nature or comfort zone to do for the sake of Him - so that many may come to know Him. I submit to the unique authority system set in place, eat a certain way, speak differently, bobble my head, dress differently, pay social calls differently, eat strange things, and the list goes on. Why? Because these are not life or death issues, and if these small changes will cause me to be all things to all people, will help more people to come to Him - then why not? Do I feel I'm losing a piece of myself? No, I feel I'm gaining more of Him.